Comments on The Light Fantastic TLF: What the mind of love reveals

Thank you Lis, it's beautiful isn't it!!Thanks to ...

2008-05-09T09:34:00.000+10:00

Thank you Lis, it's beautiful isn't it!!
Thanks to all of you!

Wow guys! What a wonderful section this has been t...

2008-05-08T08:19:00.000+10:00

Wow guys! What a wonderful section this has been to read today! You have brought me goose bumps and tears for sure.
Craig, V2T, Mary2 and Lynn - you all know how to lift a person. Words are so powerful, they can build or they can tear down. I think this section has built all of us up today.
I hope you all keep posting comments here coz I love to read everything that you all have to say. Lynn, keep breaking that personal rule of yours ok? You bring an energy that is pure love and kindness. I really felt your message about forgiveness.
Have an awesome day everyone!!! LisC

Thanks Mary2. What a lovely comment.

2008-05-08T06:09:00.000+10:00

Thanks Mary2. What a lovely comment.

This is all so refreshing, healing, uplifting, enc...

2008-05-07T10:44:00.000+10:00

This is all so refreshing, healing, uplifting, encompassing, and therapeutic read for me today!

I said i will visit yet again. And so here I am. i felt like I've never left my computer and this blog yesterday. The good energy just keeps leaping out of the monitor and re-charging me. if not for the TO DO LIST that I have on my desktop which shows I have accomplished this and that yesterday, I would think that today is still yesterday!

Thank you Craig, V2T, and Lynn for making me feel I'm contributing something good myself. I am still amazed at how i can feel of worth, so welcomed, and so safe, in this medium , when I don't know any of you personally. Slowly, it seems to me that my northwest of the North American continent is experiencing a "continental shift" and drifting towards the southern hemisphere where Australia is!

Thank you all for opening your hearts and sharing your goodness and strength from within. My soul is enlarged today. It brought tears to my eyes. Your contributions have strengthened my resolve to "Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

God bless us all.

Mary2

Dearest Lynn,"It matters not what others think of ...

2008-05-06T21:57:00.000+10:00

Dearest Lynn,

"It matters not what others think of you..... it matters most what you in fact think of yourself.

Stand tall and stand proud........ you are willing to speak from the heart and whilst none of us is perfect you know that you are being the very best "Craig" that you can be.

I am so proud to call you my dear friend....."

AS I am indeed grateful and proud to have you as my friend.

I thank you, with all that I am. These words have sent echoes of acceptance and understanding through me and I can scarcely muster a word, other than to say Thank you, and even then it doesn't convey the depth of my gratitude. But thank you , thank you thank you. I feel a bit like Gomer Pyle!!

Love and blessings to you.

V2T - Well, the people who visit anonymously, I ha...

2008-05-06T21:53:00.000+10:00

V2T - Well, the people who visit anonymously, I have a suspicion of whom they may be, but often times am wrong. I have stopped now trying to figure out, who people are. In fact, I upset some people believing them to be V2T, and was wrong. But I simply have chosen to accept you here as you are or may wish to be. I simply accept that like you, they are people who may or may not know me and I embrace that and am grateful you all take the time to visit at all.

And lastly here, I am humbled and a little speechless at your generous acknowledgment and praise. I thank you from the innermost depths of my heart. You are always welcome here.

Dear V2T - well, I agree that the thoughts of anon...

2008-05-06T21:41:00.000+10:00

Dear V2T - well, I agree that the thoughts of anonymous and Mary2, whomever they are, are diverse and valid. Yes, I too was, and am still, very sad about the situation. I just feel an emptiness that I cannot fill. Yes, rejection, lonliness and curiosity as to why? are all enveloped like a Sara Lee apple Danish, layer upon layer upon layer. But I have tried and still am trying, to let it go. Yes, it does penetrate deeply for me. I feel a helplessness that as I reach out they do not want any part of me, or so the signs would appear to be suggesting. If I was cruel or rude to them or had given them cause, I would understand, but I don't believe I have given any of that to them.

But yes, I did want to visit the Peihopa family out of a sense of duty to my Dad. I did feel him smiling upon me. It wasn't a figment I my imagination, I felt him smile. I believe in life after death, and when I was 14 I read a book called "The birth, that we call death" and found it to be a wonderful comforting thing in a time of need. I believe in a life beyond this earthly sphere because primarily I choose to.

I found it amazing when Australia's former richest Man Kerry Packer said that when he died, there was no light and there is no life after death, yet when his sone James was describing the funeral service which was exclusive for family members and invited guests, he said Dad was there. He was reminded of what his dad said, and reitterated again, Dad was there. I believe in life after death independantly of any other being, I believe it because of the sweet and subtle feelings I have had throughout my life at different times. Like when I walked around parts of Hawaii and I felt a pull to certain places. On one occasion I met a Maori, who perceptively asked why are you here boy, and I mentioned that my Dad had been in the polynesian group that opened this cultural centre back in 1963. He asked me what was your dad's name, and when I told him, the tears flowed down his face like raindrops from heaven. He composed himself and then related to me in maori and english, my ancestry and whilst I do not recall the details in as much detail as he shared, I will never forget the overwhelming feeling of love and warmth that I believe emanated from people of my ancestors who KNEW I was near. I felt covered in that warmth and glow. The only other time that happened was on the Marae in Te Awamutu when I was welcomed back into the stephens whanau (family) from whence I was born and adopted. A more powerful feeling I have never before felt. It was a feeling that transcended time and space it was one of those times when I have felt completely at one with those whose faces I could only seeon a wall. It was like they had said to me both in New Zealand and Hawaii, Boy, you are home, only to a home I had never before known.

I believe, and the spiritual feeling that accompanies that belief whispers to me, it is so.

So with that feeling and with that love I have, it makes the emptiness of rejection from people whom I do know that I am related to, whether by law or by blood, for me it is the same, that deep question of having a place or belonging is not compromised, it is just vacant for those whom I wish to be present with. That is all.

I know my Dad lives, only not in a physical body as I have, but he lives nonetheless. I feel at times he is saddened by what I do, and is elated at other times. I once wanted to know if Allen, my step dad and Maurice, my birth dad were / are proud of me, and I somehow feel that in their own ways they are....I will ask them in a coming day and am sure will have my eyes wet with their response.

Craig/V2T.... your love and compassion as shown th...

2008-05-06T21:39:00.000+10:00

Craig/V2T.... your love and compassion as shown through this medium humbles me.

Like you Craig, I have suffered the rejection not once but many times through adoption. I spent 28 years trying to find my natural family, once achieved I then spent 5 years trying to re-connect a bond between us, once that failed I then spent the next 10 years in a silent suffering as to why I was not worthy yet again of such simple love and acceptance. The last 2 years I have spent forgiving. It's such a simple word yet one that holds such complex meaning and depth. Forgive them, they have their reasons, but most importantly forgive yourself.And we need also to forgive those who can so easily find fault in what was a simple and pure account of deeply heart felt emotions (anonymous) As Mary said in her comment we have to truly let it go. Much easier said than done when your very existence is denied. But... also necessary for your inner survival and strength.

Know that you're not alone... there will always be people who understand, people who can show compassion regardless of whether they share personal experiences (thankyou V2T)

I now thank those in life who have rejected me, denied me, abandoned me. They had their own personal nightmares of reality to deal with. In the process they created the individual I am. Like you Craig, I am superbly comfortable in this skin of mine. I know me well, I hold regular appraisals and whilst the standards I set are high they are gained and upheld. But only to my standards... I don't hold myself accountable to what the world expects of me.

It matters not what others think of you..... it matters most what you in fact think of yourself.

Stand tall and stand proud........ you are willing to speak from the heart and whilst none of us is perfect you know that you are being the very best "Craig" that you can be.

I am so proud to call you my dear friend.....

I loved the song V2T sent to you... it kinda said it all really!

Thanks for being such a "real" person. And thanks for sharing that with others.

Love Lynn (aka the woman who said she wasn't going to write any more public comments on your blog.... oh well.... sometimes I feel it necessary to share with others... will forgive myself for this one too hahahaha)

Mary2. I certainly appreciate your comments, I cer...

2008-05-06T21:18:00.000+10:00

Mary2. I certainly appreciate your comments, I certainly am humbled greatly by your reference to my heart being good. I hope so, and I try always to keep my posts and follow up comments in a positive light, as I want to be a happy person, not that I wish not to have problems and challenges, I want that as you indicate, that people will feel welcome and happy here.

No need to be sad about me explaining, though I feel grateful for your support, but for me, it is important sometimes to ensure the thoughts I have conveyed are rarely, lightly done. I try in my limited capacity to ensure the comments are accurate. I keep thinking that I never know who V2T is, who even you are, and others who choose to remain anonymous, and I would hate to lose a friend or colleague because i was thoughtless or careless. Though I expect that in the natural course of living each day, I do put some people off, though I try hard not to. I only want that when the anonymous person commented earlier, I felt they had formed a conclusion about me and my motives that I felt needed further information to understand.

Thank you. It has been a very interesting and surreal experience to have people spring to my support on this blog. It truly has altered my sense of life when I may have previously felt that I walk alone. Clearly, that is not the case. Thanks to you, and all those who visit here.

Just some additional thoughts...Something I have a...

2008-05-06T13:32:00.000+10:00

Just some additional thoughts...

Something I have always admired and respected about Craig is that he takes the time to answer almost every comment made by his readers.

Sometimes he is replying to people he knows, others are anonymous. Regardless of the person's identity he shows enough respect for a person's point of view to acknowledge it, even if he doesn’t agree with it.

He has the power to censure the comments section and block anonymous entries, but he chooses not to. I believe that shows a courageous side to Craig's character. I admire that greatly.

It seems to me as a reader, that the anonymous individuals are actually known to Craig. I suspect that they may be some of his nearest and dearest friends and family. This seems evident in the familiarity of their tone and they seem to 'know' Craig beyond this medium.

Perhaps using the anonymous option gives them the opportunity to say what they have to say without hurting a friend or damaging a friendship.

Interestingly, it is in many of Craig's replies to challenging comments that additional information is given, adding a fuller story to his original post. This is certainly the case here today.

I have challenged Craig on a few occasions myself. Whilst I have made efforts to be respectful, I believe I have failed on this count in a few of my entries.

I offer a sincere apology to Craig for any ‘sting’ in my past words. Sometimes my tone can be too direct and I am learning, from Craig, to tone that down. I warmly acknowledge you today Craig and I sincerely thank you for the things you teach me here.

I thank you for your patience with me and for continuing to make me feel welcome here in spite of the one or two ‘tussles’ we have had. I agree with ‘Mary2’ Craig, you do have a good heart and a very uplifting blog.

V2T

Hi Craig,I had very little time to respond yesterd...

2008-05-06T13:01:00.000+10:00

Hi Craig,

I had very little time to respond yesterday, hence my brief but heart-felt message to you. I am so pleased that you understood the sentiment.

I am very interested in the comments of 'anonymous' and 'Mary2' and I believe they both have valid perspectives. Everyone sees a situation from a different vantage point.

I was deeply saddened by your post "What the Mind of Love Reveals." It showed another dimension to your adoption story and conveyed the background story of rejection.

I was so very impressed that you made the effort to search out and find all of your father's family. You said that you thought he was very pleased about that. That told me that you believe he is very much 'alive' although he has physically passed away. I am fascinated by the concept of a life after this one, and you obviously believe something about that.

It remains a mystery to you as to why your adopted father's family chooses not to maintain contact with you. Your sadness at not being recognized as part of the Peihopa bloodline is very understandable. The sadness of that must penetrate very deeply for you.

You went out on a limb to put that in words - very courageous my friend.

V2T

i am currently going through a very rough time mys...

2008-05-06T12:29:00.000+10:00

i am currently going through a very rough time myself, with family health issues being at the top of the list and the rest seem insignificant after that. When you have experienced death staring right at you as I have, you never treat life and everything about life ever so lightly again.

There is more to life than "bickering" over who is right and who is wrong, "Craig said this, and Anonymous said that, and so on, and on...."

I come to this blog to be uplifted and hope to get some peace and positive energy out of every person's good heart. Craig, you have a very good heart. You have the ability to inspire the rest of us to do good or be better even. You are currently going through some rough times yourself (as you have described so in your posts), and therefore focus your energy on things that will positively sustain you and your family throughout the ordeal.

i am saddened that you have to explain at length (and waste your precious time and energy) why you said or did this and that to someone you don't even know.
Craig, let it go. Leave it alone. LEAVE THEM ALONE. They'll eventually get the message, they'll move on and find someone else to pry on.

Just remain true to yourself, true to your beliefs, true to your craft and profession.

This is a wonderful blog, and it will only get better . No one is perfect, but in due course of time, you will get to understand your fellowmen better, and we (your readers ) will get to understand you better.

I will visit yet again.....

V2T - Thank you. Message received and understood.-...

2008-05-06T07:01:00.000+10:00

V2T - Thank you. Message received and understood.

-----------------------------------------

Anonymous - I am not sure if you have read the same blog post that I have, and am not sure of the link between refraining from mentioning God and my family. Part of me wants not to respond to this comment, but against my better judgement I shall.

I appreciate that your stance on this point indicates that "maybe I shouldn't air (the points I have raised) publicly". and accept that maybe they have valid reasons, I even acknowledged that I thought. As I said, I was not angry at them, I love them, and feel saddened that the love I extend is met with no response. What you are not aware of, is that the places that my aunty Shirley stayed at this past visit, she spoke about looking forward to catching up with me, and looked forward to meeting my family. She spoke to them of things that she wanted to do and yet failed to make a phone call. A single phone call. You also are not aware that in the last two visits to this country she sent me emails asking could she stay with me, giving me dates, flights and times. The answer was of course a resounding yes! from me, Yet in the first case she failed to actually arrive in the country. I found out three months later from someone else she didn't end up coming here...HULLO!! I knew that. But no word from her then as to why, again she had a valid reason I am absolutely sure. On this last occasion she again asked for my assistance and engaged my services for transport and other things, I altered my schedule to accommodate her, because I wanted to, and then nothing. I find out from the last person she stayed with her plane was leaving Sydney at a certain time on a certain airline, so Nisha and I went out there, again out of our way, but it was a pleasure to do that thinking we would see her, and again nothing. I am still a tad confused why, and I proffered a couple of reasons, one of them which is on public record in the New Zealand courts, but as the dear V2T indicated in the first comment, just let it go, and I think and hope I have. Because the growing sadness could lead to bitterness and then it spirals from there.

Perhaps you are right, if my aunty and Elizabeth had a blog they might make unfavourable comments about me and I might be "exposed" for being a person of weakness and foible. I have made that point many times here myself. Remember no matter what is said in a blog, no matter what is said publicly, I can of course be embarrassed and shamed, but then can't we all. Nobody can put me down, perhaps no body can put any of us down, better than we do to ourselves.

I expect NO perfection from any person, when I have sooooo many faults of my own. I would hope though, that if they or anyone else for that matter had a blog and felt strongly to write about me, that the posts would be constructed with the same care and respect with which I compose my posts when it concerns others, and ultimately, even if they weren't, I can only control my reaction, or action. I control nothing else. I believe THAT really is the only thing we have in life. The ability to control and direct our initial action or our response, everything else we feel we control is a myth, in my humble opinion.

Wow, the biggest sting of this comment was reserved for the last part. "Poor Ole me" syndrome? Am not sure from where this comment has it's genesis, but let me say that I have never tried to be a victim, I have never tried to elicit any sympathy from saying wo is me on my blog. Primarily because that's never or very rarely how i feel. I would hope that is not the message you receive. But if it is, I guess that reveals more about you and your experiences than it does me. Thank you though, I do look each day in the mirror, as scary as that prospect is, and try everyday to be better today than yesterday, and as I commented in a previous post, sometimes I succeed. But make no mistake, I have weaknesses, more than I would wish for. But in a subtle and bizarre way, I feel that not to be a cankered ailment, but an empowering blessing. It helps me also understand clearly, that if I point the finger at you, there are three more fingers of my own hand pointing back at me.

I hope that I have treated your comment with respect and care.

Craig, you confuse me yet again, You claimed that...

2008-05-05T17:56:00.000+10:00

Craig, you confuse me yet again, You claimed that expressing your thanks to God in a blog is somewhat very personal to you and rather not mention it, but here you mention names, show faces and relate spme rather "too personal issues with family members, that maybe you shouldn't air publicly? Worse when it is one-sided view! Why didn't you get the response you so wanted from them? Maybe they too have a valid reason or reasons? if only they have their own blogs... what would they write and what would we read we about YOU? That "poor ole me" syndrome strikes again? Maybe you need to take a closer and more honest look at that man in the mirror yet again.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0kT7iTz2ocV2T

2008-05-05T11:53:00.000+10:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0kT7iTz2oc

V2T